FAQs

I think I might be gay

Knowing you’re gay is not something you can always work out straight away. Your sexual identity usually develops over time. Some Lesbian, Gay or Bisexual people say they ‘felt different’ at an early age. For others it can take much longer and you may not fully realise and understand your feelings until later in life.

Don’t be worried about this. Finding out about your feelings and what makes you ‘tick’ isn’t something you have to rush. Experimentation and exploration are often part of that. You may find these experiences pleasurable, troubling or a mix of the two.

Over time you will find that you are drawn mostly to men or women or both – and you’ll know then. If you’re feeling confused, you’re not alone. It’s not unusual to feel attracted to someone you are close to or admire like a close friend or a teacher.

For information and support:

www.lgbtyouth.org.uk – LGBT Youth Scotland, a national organisation supporting lesbian, Gay, bisexual and transgender young people

Am I ready for sex?

You can be the only person to judge whether you’re ready to have sex, but this might help you to decide:

Legally, you can’t have sex until your 16. But it takes more than being the right legal age to make you ready for sex – you need to be emotionally ready too.

Some questions to think about whether you are ready:

Have you discussed having sex with your partner?
Are you having sex because you’re worried your partner will break up with you?
Have you talked about – keeping safe using contraception and condoms?
Can you imagine being naked with your partner without feeling uncomfortable?
Have we talked about what we want, and don’t want?

If you haven’t thought about any of these things maybe you’re not ready yet to have sex.

Think about what your limits are. There are plenty of ways to be intimate with another person that might be more comfortable than having sex would be. If you’re fine with kissing, cuddling, touching make sure you talk to your partner about this.

If you’re thinking that you’ll need to be drunk to have sex or only find yourself thinking about sex when you’re drunk, then maybe you’re not ready.

It can help to talk to someone about this. It can help to talk things through with someone first – you can do this at a sexual health service

Your first time may not be like a scene from a movie, but hopefully by thinking about what is right for you, will help ensure that you won’t regret what happens.